YO MOMMA JOKES
You probably won't find these funny. We did though and that's why they're here.
If you've a got a good Yo Momma joke, please head to Contact Rock Realms and share it with the rest of the world!
Please note, we know these are a bit rude but they really do make us chuckle. Oh, and the majority of these can also be used as Yo Poppa jokes if needed. This is all meant in fun. DO NOT take offence!
Jokes last updated ... 13th May 2011 ...
Yo Momma is so fat she fell in love and broke it. (Thanks to Joseph Piceno)
Yo Momma is so fat, after sex I rolled over twice and I was still on the bitch.
Yo Momma is so fat you have to talk about her in plural.
Yo Momma is so fat, that in an all you can eat contest she ate all the food, the other contestants, the tables, the chairs, three of the judges and an unfortunate motorist who was passing by.
Yo Momma is so ugly, if she were a scarecrow, even the corn would run away.
Yo Momma is so fat, when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge.
Yo Momma is so ugly, she looks like she's been bobbing for French fries.
Yo Momma is so smelly, when she spreads her legs I get sea sick.
Yo Momma is so fat, every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
Yo Momma is so ugly, she didn't get hit with the ugly stick, she got hit with the ugly forest.
Yo Momma is so ugly, she could only be Yo Momma.
Yo Momma is so fat, her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.
Yo Momma is so fat, her driver's license says "Picture continued on other side."
Yo Momma is so ugly, she looks like her face caught on fire and they put it out with a fork.
Yo Momma is so ugly, she practices birth control by leaving the lights on.
Yo Momma is so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it wouldn't even come back.
Yo Momma is so ugly, that if ugly were an Olympic event, she would be the dream team.
Yo Momma is so ugly, she pretends she's someone else when she's having sex.
Yo Momma is so ugly, the Pro-Lifers would make an exception in her case.
Yo Momma is so ugly, the last time I saw something that looked like her, I pinned a tail on it.
Yo Momma is so fat, she has to get out of the car to change gears.
Yo Momma is so ugly, when she masturbates she gets arrested for cruelty to animals.
Yo Momma is so fat, she's on both sides of the family.
Yo Momma is so fat, she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
Yo Momma is so fat, she masturbates reading cookbooks.
Yo Momma is so ugly, when two guys broke into her apartment, she yelled "rape" and they yelled "NO!"
Yo Momma is so ugly, Frankenstein's Monster would go to a Halloween party as her.
Yo Pappa is so thick he thinks loading the dishwasher means getting Yo Momma drunk.
Yo Momma is so stupid she'd move the house two feet forwards to take up the slack in the clothes line.
Yo Momma is so fat her stomach has tides.
Yo Momma is so ugly, when she was born the doctor smacked everyone.
Yo Momma is so fat, she sat on the corner and the police came & said "Break it up!"
Yo Momma is so fat her ass looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.
Yo Momma is so fat her ass has it's own congressman.
Yo Momma is so fat she puts on tampons with a bazooka.
Yo Momma is so stupid she couldn't tell which way an elevator was going if I gave her two guesses.
Yo Momma is so fat she wakes up in sections.
Yo Momma is so fat her nickname is "DAMN".
Yo Momma is so fat she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
Yo Momma is so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts.
Yo Momma is so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
Yo Momma is so fat, one day she was lifting up her rolls and a car fell out.
Yo Mamma is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks.
Yo Momma is so ugly the doctor is still smacking her ass.
Yo Momma is so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo Momma is so ugly she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning.
Yo Momma is so ugly your father takes her to work with him so he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
Yo Momma is so stupid, she thought Sherlock Holmes was a housing project.
Yo Momma is so fat, when she walked in front of the TV I missed 3 commercials.
Yo Momma is so fat I had to take a train and two busses just to get on her good side.
Yo Momma is so fat all the restaurants in town have signs that say: 'Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Momma'.
Yo Momma is so fat when she runs she makes the CD player skip... at the radio station.
Yo Momma is so fat when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.
Yo Momma is so fat when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease, the doctor gave her 5 years to live.
Yo Momma is so ugly she could win rear of the year with her face.
Yo Momma is so dumb she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.
Yo Momma is so fat, when she sits around the house she actually sits around the house.
Yo Momma is so fat she was arrested three times for jay-walking when all the time she was standing on the corner waiting for the light to change.
Yo Momma is so fat that, last time she saw 90210, she was on the scales.
Yo Momma is so old, when I told her to act her age she died.
Yo Momma is so old her birth certificate has expired.
Yo Momma is so fat she has her own moon.
Yo Momma is so fat, Yo Pappa needs crampons and an ice axe to mount her.
Yo Momma is so massive, when Yo Momma and Yo Pappa have sex, Yo Pappa wears a head torch and has a plank strapped to his ass.
Yo Momma is so fat, you used her bra cup as an igloo mould.
